It's been a while since I've done this and I'm feeling (mildly) inspired and bored so here we go. Let's play catch up, shall we? First of all, I am withdrawn from JMU for anybody interested that doesn't already know. So much for Fall's newfound motivation. Yes, it's a certainty folks; I'm a born loser with big ideas. So now my life basically consists of me looking for a job and begging my parents for money. Oh, and drinking, do a lot of that lately. I've been doing a lot of reading as well. I figure if you can't join 'em, read 'em. Not to worry, not that you would, but I DO intend on going back to school in a timely fashion. I've just got a little personal bullshit most are all too familiar with (and probably sick of hearing about) to deal with before my head is straight enough to be formally educated. Some can't understand my reasoning, maybe I am just lazy, but school has not been a priority for me and I regret having wasted another semester figuring that one out. I'm so lost and I have this suspicion that I am waiting for some sort of savior to...save me. Nobody really tells me that everything is going to be alright lately. It seems like they know better. The way things are, even saying that would plant a false hope in my brain. Alright, enough of this pointless self doubt. I suppose it's counterproductive to the cause of being productive. I just want to be a worthy member of society instead of an eking slug.
Well maybe we can stick with the theme of negativity and I can talk about how much I hate women. I truly do. It seems all girls talk about is how fat they are or how imperfect their bodies are, especially those with the most perfect of bodies. I’m even sometimes compelled to give in to insulting my physical self. I don’t know if this is pathetic or a giant call for attention but it is most certainly annoying. I am so tired of hearing ladies gripe about their tiny bit of stomach fat or their frizzy hair I could shoot myself. Personal grievances about the figure exist in all of us, it’s a natural fact. To complain so loudly and publicly, though, is the most pathetic way of searching for compliments I can find. Go throw up or something if you’re so eager to look like a stick with a big head. Just for the love of Satan stop complaining in public so my daily background noises can consist of something less annoying, like sirens or jackhammers. Nobody ever complains about important things anymore, it seems. Maybe if people were more selfless they would realize that their being a size 6 instead of 0 has no affect upon the world. Then, maybe, they would realize that there are children starving FOR REAL, not on purpose (although I’m not so sure they would feel pity so much as envy).
I also hate women’s attempts at being sexy. I think they come off as desperate and silly, but their idiotic ploys always seem to work. It’s as though they have “mastered” what little art goes into enticing the male penis, and not at all entertained the idea of intellectual stimulation. I hate people who turn every situation into an opportunity to be overtly sexual. I hate women who dance on tables. I hate women who make-out with each other just to give boys boners. I hate women’s pseudo-helplessness in convenient moments. “Like, oh my god, it seems my thong has fallen down. Can you pull it up for me?” Ugh, since when did drunk sexy traverse into acceptable behavior in everyday life? I think girls are even purposely slurring their speech these days, to give off those easy and ready to go vibes. All jokes aside, ladies please stop. Stop exploiting yourselves. Remember that before you are a girlfriend, a piece of ass, an object of sexual desire, you are a woman, and you owe a lot more to those before us that busted their ass to be seen as more than a sexual object to simply settle for the easiest method of gaining power. It’s wonderful to be sexy, but the word transcends the physical. I’m such a fem-Nazi dyke sometimes.